Particularly if you have experienced such a devastating act, you may be thinking, why do guys cheat?
It can be terrible to learn that your lover is cheating or has cheated on you. Considering all of the private times you two spent together makes it much more agonizing.
The most common inquiry when someone cheats is, "Why?" You're curious as to why your lover violated your confidence. We examined the potential causes of your man cheating in this article.
Given that males cheat more than women statistically, the reasons appear to apply to men more than to women, even though they can be applied to any gender.
Here are some of the reasons why men cheat:
1. Lack Of Discipline
Lack of discipline is one of the main reasons why men cheat.
According to research, Men genetically have strong sensual impulses, and
while these strong sensual impulses had been necessary for the
evolution of man, it is a tad devastating for monogamous relationships.
Some people think men cheat only when they don’t love their partners anymore, but this is not always true.
The love might be there, but they wander still, sometimes because
they lack self-control. We live in a time where it has become so easy to
get entangled with anyone sensually.
Social media and the internet have even aided cheating in that one
could be in the same room with their partner and setting up engagements
with someone else online.
It takes a man with solid character, strong will, and discipline to
say no to all the entanglements and easy flings flying around. It takes
self-control to not act on hormones and impulses, to say no to certain
compromising situations, and keep the marriage bed undefiled.
2. Dissatisfaction
You might be surprised, but men can also be victims of unhappy or
unsatisfactory marriages. And this can, in turn, influence them to
cheat.
Many things could make a man unhappy or dissatisfied in a
relationship. The very first of them is a relationship that is devoid of
peace. Suppose the man does not find peace with his partner, the
tendency to look outside increases.
A nagging partner can also be the reason why a man is finding solace
in the bosom of another. Another cause of dissatisfaction is when the
man’s primal need is not met.
This is one of the reasons men often claim that led them to cheat.
For example, some women rarely make love with their partner despite how
much the man asks. This could lead them to go outside to get satisfied
instead of constantly begging for it.
3. Addiction
One other reason why men cheat is that they are addicted. Sensual
addiction has become a growing problem in the 21st century, especially
with the proliferation of adult movies.
More men have become addicts and cannot even control their desires,
even if it hurts the people they love, even if it hurts them. To this
set of people, every impulse must be followed, no matter where it leads.
The only thing driving them to make decisions sometimes is their
hormones. And this has such debilitating effects on their career,
relationship, finances, and family.
It is normal for addicts to have risky behaviors such as making love
with a stranger without protection, taking drugs to enhance stamina, and
having multiple partners.
Just like a drug addict would do anything to buy a substance that can
make him high, a sensual addict can also do anything to get down with
someone; they can steal so they can pay for sensual experience or sell
valuable properties to impress someone they want to be with.
4. Thirst For Adventure
The spirit of adventure is responsible for many feats the human race has recorded. It is also one of the reasons why men cheat.
Most men, due to their nature, are intrinsically adventurous and seek
to take risks and seek excitement because of the thrill it gives.
The fallout from being caught in illicit affairs and the rush that
follows every affair without being caught suddenly makes illicit affairs
a much-anticipated adventure.
This hunger primarily arises after a prolonged duration of boring and
monotonous life which involves a repeated pattern of doing the same
expected life activities.
He cheats because he is tired of the same routine and is looking for something different, something fun and exciting.
His life is now a constant triangle between work shifts, home, and
the kids, and he needs an escape. And so, when the next opportunity
falls on his lap, he embraces it with both hands.
5. Men Cheat For Vengeance
This can also be called revenge cheating, and it occurs when a
partner decides to seek sensual relations outside after the partner has
been caught cheating.
Men sometimes do this retaliatory cheating to get back at an
unfaithful partner. When this happens, it means the man is still furious
about you cheating on him.
Often, men do this after they have said they had forgiven their
partner for cheating earlier. It is their way of expressing how to hurt
they are for what their significant other has done.
While thinking of revenge cheating doesn’t automatically make one a
terrible person, It is essential to know that revenge cheating does not
alleviate the hurt of being cheated on. Instead, it worsens the
situation and kills any hope of you two trust each other again.
6. Break Down In Communication
We have always made it clear that communication is one of the pillars
of a relationship. It is through communication that bonds form, and
relationships buds and grow.
At the start of a relationship, it is often typical for partners to
want to know everything about each other. You want to know everything
down to your new partner’s sleeping habits. But then, that novelty of a
new relationship wears off with time.
No one wants to know what the other person thinks. As communication
is dying out slowly like an ember, emotional connection fizzles away
too.
When this happens, it becomes easier for the man to cheat because
they do not feel connected to their partner, even though they are in a
relationship.
7. It Strokes Their Ego
Another reason why men cheat is that it strokes their egos. There is a
link between a man’s ego and lovemaking. This is why a man would be
more bothered about his performance in bed than a woman.
A man with a fragile sense of self or low self-esteem will cheat just
because they think it will boost their ego. People like this create a
false mental picture of themselves.
They believe that the more partners they have, the more validation
they would get. It is all a means of getting over personal insecurities.
Again, some men think having more than one sensual partner reinforces
their maleness and elevates them in the social pecking order.
Ironically, men who have this need for an ego boost find it hard to
leave relationships where they are unhappy because they are afraid they
will end up alone.
8. Men Cheat Due To Their Partner’s Unavailability
One reason why men cheat is that their partner is unavailable. This could either be emotional or physical unavailability.
When a partner is emotionally unavailable, a real connection is
absent. This can be because you both are fighting and aren’t on talking
terms.
Many men seem to cheat when there is a problem with their partner.
Unavailability of a partner can be physical, and this can be because of
the demands of the family and career. Work and trying to make ends meet
can cause partners to live far from each other.
And when their partner is not there with them, they find the next
possible person who can warm their beds. It is, therefore, not
surprising when men in long-distance relationships engage in
extramarital affairs with colleagues at work or neighbors.
9. Cheating Sometimes Is Their Way Of Dealing With Issues
For many people, especially men, making love is a way of dealing with
life. It is a way of dealing with problems at home. Sometimes, the
issues at home and in life can be overwhelming to deal with.
As a result, most men prefer to run away from problems rather than
deal with them. For example, rather than explain why he lost his job or
dealt with the result of a misunderstanding, he would prefer to have a
drink with a beautiful lady and take her to bed.
10. Cheating Is A Way Of Seeking Validation
If you are wondering why men cheat, then this might be one of the
most substantial reasons yet; the need for validation. Many women think
men cheat because they enjoy it and want to. But that is not entirely
true.
Some men enjoy being desired, admired and adored. If a man feels he
is not being valued by his partner, he might cheat. This is not absolute
but just one of the possible reasons why your man is cheating.
The less you appreciate your man, the more likely he is to cheat.
Perhaps you have not been paying attention to your man; you do not gas
him up or make him feel wanted. Don’t be surprised when he jumps ship.
Sometimes, cheating does not start off immediately.
It could be that some lady is seeing what you do not see, and they are telling him how good he is.
Just like a moth is attracted to light, your man will become
attracted to this person who tells him nice things and makes him feel
good. And before he knows it, they are already under the sheets.
11. Money Can Make Your Man Cheat
Now, this is the tricky part. Both extremes can make a man prone to
cheating. On one extreme, men can cheat because of the financial
benefits they stand to gain. Just like some women, some men can
willingly trade their bodies for money or a favor.
On the other side of the spectrum, the availability of money can
bloat a man’s ego and make him desire other women asides from his
partner.
When there is money, a man feels invincible, feels like he owns the
world and the women in it. This does not get any better, seeing that
some women would naturally gravitate to the man with the cash to spend.
So, it is not strange to see business tycoons having flings during
business trips or top managers having a go with their female
subordinates at work.
12. Men Cheat Also When They Don’t Love You
Here is a fundamental reason why men cheat. There is no more love. We
know it is sad, but you have to realize that just as people fall in
love, they also fall out of love.
When there is no longer love and attraction, relationships fall
apart, and your partner cheating is a sign that they are not interested
in you and the relationship anymore.
Love requires that he puts your feelings and emotions into
consideration. And cheating on you is no way to put your feelings first.
So, if he cheats on you, then maybe he has fallen out of love with you.
13. Sensual Energy Mismatch
There is no balance in your desires. It is purely a case of desire
discrepancy. It is possible you are not aware of this, or you might have
decided to turn a blind eye to it. You might have noticed he enjoys
lovemaking a little too much or wants it more frequently than you do.
If you are in a relationship with such a man, there is a tendency that he might look out to satisfy his desires.
Again, apart from having higher sensual energy, there are particular
preferences he might have that you may not be comfortable with.
He might even be ashamed to talk to you about it. And so he plays
safe with you and then finds someone else to have a liberating,
thrilling experience with.
14. Culture And Upbringing
His upbringing and culture shape his life and, ultimately, his
attitude towards certain issues like infidelity. If he grew up among
people who cheat or permit men to have extramarital affairs, you can be
sure he would imbibe that.
In some cultures, it is normal for men to have concubines, those they
can turn to sometimes for pleasure when he is tired of their wife or if
she is unavailable.
It could also be that he grew up in a culture that permits men to
have multiple wives. What this automatically means to him is that men
can have multiple partners without being questioned.
If he had childhood trauma, if his parents had a bad relationship
that may have involved cheating, then it becomes normalized to him, and
he sees nothing wrong with it and cheats as well.
15. He Thinks He Won’t Get Caught
Yes, some men actually do cheat just for the fun of it. They do it
just because they can, because of the pleasure, and nothing more. And
they continue all the more if they feel they have covered their tracks
well enough and cannot be caught.
What Makes Someone Cheat On Someone They Love?
You might ask, “What makes someone cheat on someone they love?” Well,
the question is valid because, in an ideal situation, lovers should not
cheat on each other. Especially because they know they are breaking a
promise and hurting their partner in the process.
But life is rarely ideal, and things are not usually black or white.
They are many gray areas. Someone can cheat on a partner they love so
much for various reasons.
One such reason is opportunity. A loving partner can cheat
just because an opportunity presents itself. Unfortunately, not everyone
has the self-will to say no when temptation knocks on the door.
They may not have been actively looking for a chance to cheat, but
after an office party, things went haywire, and he got laid. This does
not mean he doesn’t love his partner; it is just his human weakness in
him.
Another reason why men cheat even when they love their partner is
when they feel neglected. If a man feels like he is not your priority
anymore, he might go astray.
Can You Truly Love Someone And Cheat On Them?
So, can you truly love someone and cheat on them? Is it really
possible to love someone yet have a fling with someone else? Well, yes.
It is possible to love someone and yet cheat on them.
There has been a popular misconception about lovers and
cheating. Most people are of the school of thought that cheating occurs
only in the absence of love. But then, this is not entirely true.
Humans are unpredictable and uncertain and can have changes in
character. A man can cheat even though he loves you and the reason is
that love is not enough.
Love is not enough to build a relationship, and it is also not enough
to keep a man from cheating. Love and self-discipline are the right
combinations.
Mindset Of A Cheating Man
The mindset of a cheating man is one of the reasons that has
been fingered a lot in the discussion about cheating. As a man thinks,
so he is.
If a man grows up in an environment where women are objectified,
there is a great chance such a man would not be faithful. Instead, he
would see women as playthings that he could have as he pleases.
The kind of friends a man has will also determine his view on
cheating. If a man has friends that do not see cheating as a big deal,
he won’t see it as a big deal either.
Some men even brag about the number of women they could lay. When
they gather over beer, they list their body count as a thing of pride.
When they do this, they command respect from their friends, and they
think it is a thing of honor to be able to bed many ladies.
Why Men Cheat On Loyal Women
Wondering why men cheat on loyal women? Well, we have a few reasons why men cheat even when their woman is faithful.
First off, some men cheat because they can. They have
observed their partners and seen that it would take a lot for their
partners to walk, and so they go around cheating.
They take their wives for granted and do whatever they want because
they think they can eat their cake and have it. They can be in a secure
relationship and yet get to frolic with others; think of it as getting
the best of both worlds.
A second reason men cheat on loyal women is attachment disorders. The
way a man is brought up contributes to how he feels about cheating. If a
man was not dotted on when he was a child, he tends to seek that care
in others.
Again, value or the lack thereof is one reason a man is cheating. It
is possible that the man no longer values or has any regard for his
partner. Once it has gotten to this level, the man can cheat on his
partner without even feeling remorseful.
Why Do Good Men Cheat?
So, why do good men cheat? Does it mean they’ve turned bad? Well, bad
things happen to good people. And sometimes, a good man can make bad
decisions.
One of those bad decisions is cheating. Various factors could lead to a good man cheating on their partner.
One reason why your good man is cheating is that he is immature and is
yet to grasp the concept of how a monogamous relationship should work.
A second reason why a good man cheats is due to insecurities. Men are
egoist beings, and most times, cheating is their way of getting
validated, of feeling enough. When he entangles with multiple partners,
he feels wanted. He feels like someone actually finds him worthy.
The third reason good men cheat is not getting the satisfaction they
need from their spouses. And so they develop friendships with others to
see if they can get what they are missing from their partner.
Why Do Guys Cheat When They Are Happy
This might surprise you, but guys can also cheat when they are happy.
A happy relationship cannot even prevent your partner from cheating.
First, a man might be satisfied with his relationship but also selfish.
They want the momentary and instant satisfaction that comes
with getting laid. The following reason is that the man is insecure.
Sometimes, older men go after younger ladies to prove to themselves that
they are still attractive and can still make heads turn.
Such a man desperately needs to feel good about his body image and
ego, so they engage in infidelity. Another reason you can find a happy
man cheating is the thrill of doing something bad.
Most men are adventurous and get off by doing something risky. This
type of man would cheat just for the fun of doing something forbidden.
Can A Cheating Man Change And Be Faithful?
So, here is the million-dollar question. Can a cheating man
change and become faithful? Is it possible for him to retrace his steps
and become loyal to his partner again? Can a cheating man be trusted to
keep his vows even when he has broken them once? The answer is yes.
A cheating man can become faithful again. But how do you know this?
It is by watching the man’s character after you had found out his
missteps.
For a man serious about changing his cheating ways, it will show in
his effort to make you believe him. First, he will show sincere remorse
over what happened and won’t try to blame it on you.
A sign of someone willing to change is taking full responsibility for
their actions. If they are still trying to play blame games with you,
then such a man is not ready to change. After showing remorse, the man
has to work on rebuilding the trust that was once shattered.
Couples recovering from a cheating episode can go together to a
therapist who will guide them out of the situation. When this process of
rebuilding trust is going on, the man mustn’t give the woman any reason
to doubt his commitment.
Conclusion
By now, you now must have known a lot of other reasons why men cheat
on their partners. If you have been a victim, we hope this article gives
you some closure as to why.
And we are this hopeful because sometimes, knowing the reason and
accepting it is the first step in healing from the trauma it might have
caused you.
If you two are dedicated to going past issues of infidelity, it is
wise you consult the services of a therapist or counselor to guide you
on what to do. Remember, it is not your fault that a man cheated. It is
solely on him.
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